Ring a ding ding- are those alarm bells ringing?

Alarm Bells

When it comes to dating there are some key signs signalling when you should opt out. These are called red flags or alarm bells. Often these signs become aparent from the first few dates, and become esspecially aparant after a few glasses of wine!

The first red flag appears when it comes time to pay the bill.

I am all up for equality but there is a time and a place. The invitee should always pay. I mean it is polite to offer to pay but I am a traditionalist when it comes to first dates and I think the invittee (man) should pay. Nothing is more awkward or uncomfortable when he accepts your offer and splits the bill.

Red flag number 2… NEVER and I mean NEVER talk about your ex on a first date. That goes for him too. If he talks about his ex on the first date something must be wrong…he either isn’t over her or he is feels he needs to gloat in front of you. First dates are about getting to know somone new, not rehashing the past.

I have surveyed quite a few women on this topic and most say if the man is too open too quickly it is a major turn off. For example talking about sex, how much of it they like, why the like it, who they’re having it with etc  etc etc .

These are fine conversation topics just not on the first date. A definite red flag when you’re just getting to know someone.

Another alarm bell is when they constantly talk about themselves…No one wants to date a narcasist (from personal experience) so if your date is constantly talking about himself then, A that is dead boring and B behaviour of a Narcasist. Conversation needs to flow and there needs to be some giving and taking.

Flag number 5…Bad table manners! A big no and a true red flag. It is a turn off and embarrassing. You can tell a lot from first impressions and bad table manners screams sloppiness. This flag also applies to swearing…swearing is unattractive and unsexy.

Also look at how he treats the women in his life (mother, sister etc)…if he doesn’t treat them well he won’t treat you well. That’s a red flag number six.



4 thoughts on “Ring a ding ding- are those alarm bells ringing?

  1. Interesting blog. Thanks for liking my post, ‘Stop getting rejected on-line.’
    Why is it all the interesting blogs about dating (that I have discovered so far) are written by women? I found one by a man who posted on the topic of cheating and that he cheated, and other men commented, ‘thanks for being so honest.’ Severely challenged in the logic department, to say the least.
    Yes indeed, talking about yourself all the time is boring. I advise men to listen a lot and try to speak half as much as the woman, and since men imagine that women talk twice as much as they do, the end result will be that both will talk about the same amount as each other (do the math).
    We men should try to preserve our air of manly mystery.

  2. I really can’t stand anyone who talks about themselves too much but I especially dislike it on dates. I also never offer to pay on a first date. Maybe that makes me a bad person..but I’m old fashioned.

  3. Very true my friend. I have been guilty of talking about the ex, not b/c I am not over it, but b/c it was relevant to the conversation and the new emerging me. Nevertheless, I see the error of my ways and find it inappropriate from both sides.

  4. Pingback: Alarm bells – what not to do on a first date | Cornelius Agrippa

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